AI Chatbot Safety for Kids

Some practical thoughts for parents and grandparents

I enjoy using AI to build tools and explore ideas. I have shared some of those projects here, and I still find it amazing that I can describe something I would like to create and get help building it. As a grandfather, I also think about what this technology means for the younger members of our families.

Helping a child understand a homework assignment is one thing. Having a chatbot become the person they turn to when they are lonely or upset is something I would be much more cautious about. The American Academy of Pediatrics warns that children can become attached to chatbots that seem caring, even though these programs cannot provide the human relationships children need. (healthychildren.org)

I think we can appreciate what AI offers while still setting limits on how our children use it.

Start with a conversation

Before deciding which apps to block, I would start by asking your child what they already use.

“Have you tried any AI chatbots?”

“What do you like about them?”

“Has one ever said something that made you uncomfortable?”

The goal should be to understand their experience, rather than make them feel like they are being questioned for doing something wrong. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends a calm, curious approach and suggests looking at conversations together. (healthychildren.org)

One thing I would want a child to hear clearly is: “If a chatbot says something upsetting or inappropriate, you can show me. You won't be in trouble for asking for help.”

Explain that friendly does not mean trustworthy

A chatbot can sound patient, interested, and understanding. That can make it easy for a child to treat it like a friend. The FTC has raised concerns about how human-like chatbot responses may encourage children and teens to trust these programs and form relationships with them. (search.ftc.gov)

I would explain it in simple terms: “This is software that generates responses. It can sound caring, but it is not a person who knows you and can look after you.”

I would avoid AI companion apps for children, especially ones built around romantic relationships or being someone's best friend. Common Sense Media recommends that children under 18 not use AI for friendship, emotional support, or mental health advice. (commonsensemedia.org)

If a child needs someone to talk to, I would help them identify a trusted adult they feel comfortable approaching. That might be a parent, grandparent, teacher, or school counselor.

Keep personal information out of the conversation

Privacy is another area I would take seriously. The American Academy of Pediatrics cautions that information shared with a chatbot is not guaranteed to stay confidential. (healthychildren.org)

My suggested family rule would be to leave out:

• Full names, home addresses, phone numbers, and school names.
• Passwords or information about family accounts.
• Private photos and documents.
• Details about where family members will be and when.
• Other people's personal information.

For homework help, I would encourage children to type the question without including identifying details.

Before approving an app, read its privacy policy. Look for what it collects, how it uses conversations and recordings, and how you can request deletion. The FTC recommends reviewing a service's information practices before allowing it to collect your child's data. (consumer.ftc.gov)

Set limits that fit their age

I would not give a young child unrestricted access to a chatbot.

Common Sense Media's guidance recommends no chatbot use for children five and under, limited use alongside a parent for ages six through twelve, and supervised use for homework and creativity for teenagers. Those are safety recommendations, not permission to ignore an individual service's minimum age requirements. (commonsensemedia.org)

For a family choosing to allow AI, I would suggest agreeing on a few rules:

• Use only apps a parent has reviewed and approved.
• Follow the service's age requirements.
• Use AI in a shared space, particularly with younger children.
• Set a stopping time and keep devices out of bedrooms overnight.
• Explain what parents will review, rather than making monitoring a secret.
• Stop and get an adult if a conversation becomes sexual, threatening, or encourages dangerous behavior.

I would also review any available parental controls, but I would not treat a settings menu as a substitute for staying involved.

Teach them to check the answer

A confident response is not necessarily a correct one. Chatbots can give false or misleading information, including advice that could lead a child toward unsafe actions. (healthychildren.org)

For schoolwork, I would encourage prompts such as “Give me a hint” or “Explain how this works,” instead of asking the chatbot to complete the assignment. Then ask your child to explain what they learned in their own words and check important information against their textbook or another reliable source.

For questions about health, medication, or emotional distress, I would direct them to a trusted adult and an appropriate professional rather than let a chatbot make the decision.

Pay attention if AI starts replacing people

If a child starts withdrawing from family and friends, or seems to prefer talking to a chatbot over spending time with people, I would take that seriously. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends talking with your child's doctor when this happens. (healthychildren.org)

I would approach it without making fun of the attachment. The conversation may feel very real to them. Ask what they get from the chatbot and what has been difficult in their offline life.

If a child mentions suicide or self-harm, seek human help rather than continuing the conversation through AI. In the United States, you can call or text 988 for crisis support, including when you are concerned about someone else. Call 911 if someone is in immediate danger. (988lifeline.org)

Stay involved

My suggestion is to try an approved tool together before letting your child use it independently. Ask a few questions, review the answers, and talk about what you would and would not share.

I enjoy technology, but I also place a lot of value on time with family. I want our children and grandchildren to feel comfortable bringing their questions and concerns to us, even when those conversations are difficult. (denniskeefe.me)

We don't have to know everything about AI to have that conversation. We can begin by asking what they are using and making time to listen.

Have you talked with your children or grandchildren about AI chatbots? I would be interested to hear what rules your family has put in place.